


The Perfect Straight Man

by GoodJanet



Category: Actor RPF
Genre: Banter, Best Friends, Double Entendre, Kissing, M/M, Sneaking Around
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-15
Updated: 2016-05-03
Packaged: 2018-06-02 11:20:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 395
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6564196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GoodJanet/pseuds/GoodJanet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jack and George sneak off for a little fun.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It's a tradition (of sorts) that they've upheld since their golden days in vaudeville. They end the show by waving to the audience and smile big before slipping between the velvet curtains, past the snack tables, and towards one of their dressing rooms.

Once the door is securely shut, George makes some crack about Gracie. Jack's heard the joke hundreds of times by now, but he let's George say it again. It all part of their routine, after all. George says that if she ever caught them, she’d ask them why he was giving Jack mouth-to-mouth standing up. And because Jack thinks everything George says is hilarious, he cracks up. George loves having Jack as his private audience; Jack's always been a responsive person.

So they fit together seamlessly. They’ve always worked well together. They were there for each other before Mary and Gracie were ever in the picture. They had each other when all Jack had was his violin, and all George had was a cigar.

Jack's stream of consciousness is interrupted when George gets into his space, grinning crookedly. Jack lets himself be pulled in by the lapels of his jacket, and George lets Jack wrap his hands around his waist. George wonders if any other Jack’s other guest stars ever got this sort of treatment or if he was a special case.

“Now _you’re_ thinking too loudly, George,” Jack says.

“You mean you could hear my thoughts all this time?” George asks, ever the perfect straight man.

“Yes, and you should have your mouth washed out with soap.”

Jack kisses him again before he can respond, mouth fitting over George’s like all the other dozens of times they’ve done this. George laughs into the kiss. Because he thinks Jack is hilarious too.


	2. Chapter 2

“George Burns, that is downright foul, and I’m appalled that you’d ask me.”

“Relax, Jack. It’s not like I asked you to shoot someone.”

“Well, no, but George.”

“Don’t sound so scandalized. You can’t tell me no one’s ever done it for you.”

“Well…I didn’t say that. All I mean is that—”

George cuts him off.

“And you never asked a girlfriend if she would do it?”

“Well, sure, but—”

“Jack, you can’t tell me that you didn’t try to persuade her.”

“George, if you think for one second that I’m going give you a foot rub, you’re crazy!”


End file.
